The pursuit of happiness.

​I have fallen so hard,

I’ve roared since dawn,

But I haven’t found happiness.

They told me to earn gold,

And then said I’ve been doing this wrong.

Now I wonder where is my voice,

Realised I’m left with no choice.

They asked me to dance on their rhythm,

Like its their life and their decision .
I’m crawling in front of them,

And asking for this to end,

But I haven’t found happiness.

They told me it’s not rare,

I can find happiness every where.

They told me I can learn to smile,

If only I can see who is mine.

And so I thought this is not a difficult task,

All I would have to do is ask.

Sought through the storms of life,

Found no one to call mine.
Now I’m screaming so high,

Tired of hearing voices in my mind,

Still they got issues with my life.

Thought I should give up this time,

But A voice in my head echoed so high,

Told me to still my inner pond.

Because this is where happiness is found. 

Believing in myself was the answer,

Now I shouldn’t bother the audience. 

Uncertainity

​Some Days I feel like telling You to stay where you are, and others I feel like asking you to come back.

I’m so tired of standing still-

and of waiting.

But even if you come back.

Our talks wouldn’t be the same, uncertainty has a certain awkwardness.

I know I’m not

the same that is-

Or certain for that matter of anything anymore.

How could I be when I was left?

Not even for someone else but just because you didn’t think I was good enough.

Freindship does not prevail, it cultivates and yours was infertile.

How could I be the same after something like that?

Epiphany

​I don’t have staying bones,

They’re hollow and light.

The only thing missing are wings.

I don’t have a staying heart

It has a habit of wandering into reaching hands.

I don’t have a staying mind,

My thoughts leave,

to find you all the time.
I don’t have a staying anything.

But I would have stayed for you.

Run.

tYou get too close it gets too much,

it’s get too real.

Run.

before you reach for hands,that suddenly aren’t there anymore.

Run.

before it becomes too much to carry,and you both start putting down pieces of each other that you promised you would never let go of.

Run.

before they lose that dream-like quality before you start to resent waking up next to them.

run before this becomes a bitter ending to your story,

you never liked cliffhangers but that’s what you became.

Run because the only other option is to stay.

Crossroads

​It’s all fussing my mind again,

Why do I feel like this?

You are not you anymore,

I am not what I was before.

It still rushes through my vein,

Like there is something that it lacks. 

May be its you. 

Or maybe I just have to come to terms with the fact that it will always be you But it’ll never be us again.

It’s been a long time that I haven’t seen you, but when I did today, I was scared, I was scared that you might not want to see me again,

Or you might not feel the way I feel about you.

It still bothers my temperature, it goes higher,

I lose my senses, well I’ve lost them way back, when I lost you.

But its you, the shivering in my hands,the clouds around my head.

I remember crying over you, and I don’t mean a couple of tears or I’m blue. I’m talking about collapsing and screaming at the moon.

And I never got to know when my affection became this pain, and that It became you.